What’s your opinion about fantasies driven by sexless periods in a relationship.
51F. 25+ years married
How are you dealing with sexual fantasies in a relationship where sex isn’t prioritized from the husband? I’ve always had fantasies about two men and myself but lately I’ve found that this is overwhelmingly taking over my thoughts. I find myself reading books specifically relating to this scenario. I have always wanted to do this but usually if we are actively engaging is sex on a regular basis I’m able to keep this down deep inside. Unfortunately, I’ve almost convinced myself that I deserve this at least once in my life.
I’m not sure if mentally or physically want to have an affair, it just seems the longer we go without being intimate the more that I’m becoming obsessed with these thoughts. I know that fantasy and reality are not exactly equal.
How often do you think a lack of sexual contact starts to lead people into sexual obsessions?
I’m sure many people have struggled with similar issues, but how often do these start to mentally become justified in a way where you are seriously considering looking outside the relationship to scratch an itch?
It’s like scolding a child when I bring up sex or lack of it. Immediately he becomes defensive like I’m getting on to him for not putting out. The truth is the he doesn’t seem to take it the way it’s meant when I bring it up. A few years ago, ED happened but the MD prescribed medication & that is no longer an issue if he chooses to take it. It’s almost like he is offended when I mention that we are not intimate often enough, I regret that years ago I didn’t prioritize sex the same way I should have because it was assumed we would always have it.