u/Public-Run4509

About three years ago I got 'cancelled' online. My family can't handle basic emotional support so they kept increasing stress on me/being abusive until they admitted me to a psychward. I wasn't even in crisis, they just couldn't handle slight emotional support.

But what I'm talking about is that when someone has an actual problem, such as people in your local area trying to piss you off psychiatry just assumes you're delusional. Similar to when family etc. is actually abusive but psychiatry individualises the issue and you're seen as the problem. People legit got themselves admitted to the psychward so they could harass me BC of the internet. The psychiatrist wrote in the notes that I was 'paranoid about """cybergangs""" out to get me' because I explained what was going on. It's like they pretend that real world problems don't exist because they don't fit their narritive. Over the past several years I've had real problems with real people but I get blamed and they just see it as 'paranoid schizophrenia.' It's so dumb.

Not to mention that I was initially admitted to a ward a few years before it was after my mother had attempted to kill me, and she phoned and framed my freaking out as a 'psychotic break.' Psychiatry is built by abusers and authoritarians to gaslight the people they want to hurt and protect the ones on top.

I was poisoned, in actual mortal danger with my body failing and the hospital went along with framing it as a psychotic break. I still have injuries from this time and my metabolism and skeleton etc. has been permanently damaged.

I shouldn't say anything, but it's four in the morning (normal hours for me) and I need to commiserate about my situation. My mother is a lunatic. She is unhinged. She terrifies me and she'd probably love to know I said that. She is a medical/psychiatric abuser.

She pretty much believes that the world operates around her and has a god complex. She loves watching shitty Korean shows about sinister women; nothing against them if you're into them and of course they have their own merit but they've been tainted by association. The majority of my life so far has been marred by her enmeshed emotional manipulation. School, home, my health.

I can't let her into my house because she steals shit. Just hard, wish I had someone to trust.

In 2021 she attempted to kill me then phoned the police and framed me as having a psychological break for freaking out (no the police didn't listen or the psychward even though I had physical injuries that indicated self-defense). She uses psychiatry as a threat when I am anything but happy and has started just pushing for it anyway, when I literally do nothing but eat, sleep and work. I feel like she wants me to have no needs. I used to do vent art of a tiny tiny animal on the ground crying because of how much it has hurt.

She wants me to be on antipsychotics all the time because it makes her feel in control, better, like she's not the one of us that is insane. Her reasoning is that I cry and need normal human support once a year on average (usually because I am so lonely that it causes physical pain and I feel like my health is deteriorating (lowk I'm a joy to be around and the world is sleeping on me lol)) and if I do this she will say that she wishes I was dead/never want to talk to me again/starts smiling maniacally and laughing and always threatens to call someone to have me sectioned.

Now I know the obvious move is to never contact this woman again, but as I've said I'm very isolated (not by choice) and she's my closest 'friend.' I despise her tactics. I've built such a rapport with her of genuinely great times and bonding but it's all underlined with the fact that she will, whenever she wishes or sees a vulnerability, simply decide to be evil asf.

I'm probably saying this because I went to the cinema with her today and I'm trying to make a mark to remind myself to not contact her for six months again. I'm just very isolated, and my only person is someone who wants to gaslight me into thinking I'm crazy when I've spent my whole life being the reality check for her.

F*CK. I hate her so much. I can't wait until she dies. Good riddance.

Thank you for reading. Have a nice day.