i have too many things to vent about to one person
i 20m have spent about the last 3 years since highschool just waiting for my parents to do things that they did for my sister and they just havent. they put her through 5 years of schooling got her a car and payed for her insureance but havent done anything remotely close for me. i have been basically told just wait while i pay out of pocket for my classes.
they tend to pretend its also not there own fault that they cant afford it, they bought a new house a while ago and they just never put the old one on sale dispute saying they were going to when we moved, only after a little over a year did they put it on sale. on top of that they owe me close to 4k(payed into the mortgage am suppose to get it back when the old house sells) and my name is on the title of this new house which basically puts me something like 250k in mortgage debt. i know it was dumb to go along with this. theres plently of other shitty things they did but im not gonna get into it.
ive spent so long just waiting and realized they most likely never wanted me going to school anyways. i have adhd so did shit in highschool but do quite well with school work when im on my meds. my mom very clearly doesnt believe in me, i dont really know what my dad things but i dont think he much gives a shit if im being honest. my sister seems also pretty "whatever its all fine" which is easy for her to think because shes pretty indepdent at this point. the money they got for the down payment wasnt even theres it was my grandmas which i think she would be pretty pissed off if she knew how it was used.
this has all sort of lead me to a new path, ive sort of abandoned my old religoin of sikhi and have become sort of Christian.
i have basically been isolated from brown cultures. i have adhd and am high functioning autism which doesnt mix well with punjabi cultures, i feel a bit hurt by the whole thing but have found alot more friends in more asian/south indian/white cultures.
i crave the idea of relationship but also know that i shouldnt really be in one from reasons you can pick out here and others. friendships are the only thing looking good right now, i should be making some new friends soon.