Grieving my youth
Honestly, if you’re feeling the same how do you cope?
I was born in 1993 and I’m struggling with so much about getting older.
I’m struggling with the aging transition, I don’t like how I feel in myself anymore, I feel like I’m lost and stuck in this new older body.
I know I’m not old yet but time is flying by, more aging signs are showing up that are clouding my optimism and excitement for life nowadays. I used to feel so sure of myself, like I could do anything and like I had so much time. I know I still do, but that time also now comes with setbacks that are because of age. I still hopefully have 50 years left, but most of those are taken up by aging. In my 40’s I won’t feel as energetic as I do now, and then that’ll probably come with a lot of loss. Then the menopause will hit and that’s more loss of health, energy, time and my hormones.
As well as this I feel like I’m experiencing the feeling of time passing much differently. Days are flying by, I can’t quite grasp that it’s nearly May?!
I’m watching everyone I love get older, and it feels like a living nightmare.
Aging honestly sucks. I know it’s a gift, but it also feels quite horrible changing, no longer feeling secure or like myself in my younger version of myself, watching my parents show signs of aging, seeing my friends youthful optimism and excitement slowly shift.
Also I felt so happy in who I was in my 20’s, and people used to tell me I was a kind person who they like, and now I’m shifting into someone who isn’t as soft and as optimistic because I don’t feel like I look or am her anymore?
I could talk for a long time about how much I’m struggling deeply with this physical metamorphosis I didn’t sign up for.
I just want more time to stay young and healthy. I feel like aging is a curse and takes so much from us.