AITAH for distancing myself from my friend after her wedding?
My roommate and I were extremely close friends for 3 years. We were so close that her parents would call me for everything, and they treated me with a lot of love and respect. I played a huge role in improving her relationship with her parents and siblings.
At one point, her real sister came to live in our hostel too, but my friend still chose to stay with me instead of moving in with her sister. I also became friends with her sister and cousins. I always looked out for her like an elder sister would. Since she had very few friends who would not hang out with her on weekends, I included her in my friend group as well so that she’s not all alone in the hostel. She also became friends with my sister, and my sister even helped her with her wedding trousseau.
Then came her destination wedding. My sister and I attended as invited guests. When we arrived around lunchtime, my friend was genuinely happy to see me. She introduced me to her future husband and mother-in-law and told them how important I was to her and that she considered me her “second mother.” That honestly made me emotional.
However, after lunch, things started feeling strange. We were waiting for room allotments, and her entire family—people who knew me very well—basically ignored me and the other friends from her side. We sat in the lobby for almost 3 hours waiting for rooms while nobody from the family seemed to care.
Later, during the events, her family again acted like they barely knew us. My friend herself stayed glued to her fiancé and his side the entire time and didn’t spend any time with her own friends. Meanwhile, the groom’s friends were constantly being attended to and included.
By the wedding day, it felt even worse. She barely acknowledged any of us and never left the groom’s side. My sister and I left the dinner party early, only to find her other friends sitting by the pool complaining about the same behavior and saying they just wanted to go home.
The next morning, my sister and I left without meeting her because I felt deeply hurt and disrespected. What upset me most was remembering how involved I had been in her life and how her parents used to call me for every little thing.
I didn’t confront her because I didn’t want to ruin her wedding or happiness. It’s now been a year. She still calls me occasionally, but I usually say I’m busy, make small talk, and end the call quickly.
Part of me wants to tell her how hurt I felt, but another part of me doesn’t want to because of the way she introduced me so lovingly to her husband and mother-in-law.
So, AITA for distancing myself from her after the wedding?