Is it wrong that we put our marriage first?
Whenever my husband gets paid he buys me a gift, a treat, and puts money on my coffee account. He also puts aside an entire day each week to dedicate to just being with me and we just....be. yeah were usually home but its still there.
We have 6 kids between the 2 of us. I came with 4 boys and he had a boy and girl. They all live with us full time. I have sole custody of my boys so since my oldest was 5 (now 16 almost 17) thats dad. SS and SD not so much. We just recently got them (16 f and 13m) full time back in October due to BM getting a divorce and moving in with her mother and they hate their MGM cause she's a hateful woman(their words) and BM refuses to be a mom (their words)
So the thing with the gifts and the yada yada is routine basically. My boys are used to it and always get excited to see what gift dad brings home mom and I usually share my treats and spend my coffee money on them sometimes too...I like to share. But SS and SD arent vibing with that.
They think its weird and rude dad buys mom gifts and treats and not anyone else.
"Why do you always put mom first?" Is the question always asked in various ways.
My husband always answer the same way....
We chose each other then and choose each other now.
I put him first and he puts me first but TOGETHER we put our kids first.
They're spoiled rotten and they know it. After bills and necessities we spend plenty on all the kids as equally as possible. But for some reason my husband buying me gifts and treats and taking time to just be with me irks the hell out of SS and SD....
This go 'round he bought me some yarn for a project im working on (he got the right one im so proud) and SD was PISSED because he just told her she couldn't have a $70 video game but just couldn't wait to spend $15 on two balls of yarn for me....SS got involved and agreed that a game for the kids was more valuable than yarn for my project.
He told her to build a bridge and get over it, and told him go stop riding her coat tails in entitlement. But I feel almost guilty because im worried its going to cause issues that weve always had this policy of our relationship comes first, our family as a whole second.
Like....are we wrong? Or am I just being a nervous Nelly?