Parenting After Age 35
Hello,
To give you a general idea of the situation, I’m in France, and my girlfriend is in Panama. She wants to move closer to where I live so we can be together and so she can finish her long course of study at a university near where I live. We share the same views on parenting and marriage. Namely, that a couple needs to be strong to handle the arrival of a newborn—at least that’s what we believe. In short, we’re talking about having children to make sure we’re on the same page, and that’s where the problem lies:
I’m in my early thirties, and for me, this is the perfect time to start a family. I have a pretty good job, a decent place to live, and an amazing woman who’ll make a wonderful mom. But it’s not the right time for her. She hasn’t finished her studies yet, and she wants to be more settled before embarking on this adventure—which I understand. She’s talking about waiting about five years to have kids.
But I don’t want such a big age gap with my kids. I have a pretty negative feeling about that idea. Maybe I’m wrong, and that’s why I’d like to get some outside perspective on the matter. Especially from fathers over 35. What was your experience with becoming a father for the first time? Do you think it’s a good idea for a man over 35 to have children? Is it too late? How did your relationship handle this change?
Thank you.