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u/Numerous-Canary-4801

▲ 2 r/sexadvise

I feel awful. I (21f) and my boyfriend (21m) have been together for almost 3 years. Most of it was long distance, and we'd see each other every month. During that time, I could keep up with him, even though his drive is much higher than mine.

Now we live together, and it's new and we both love it, but there's an issue.

Our drives don't match.

He's constantly in need. I'm not. Sometimes I am, but most of the time, I'm not. It looks like it physically hurts him to hold himself back and it breaks both of our hearts.

I want to make it very clear HE DOES NOT PRESSURE ME. IF I SAY NO, THAT IS FINAL.

I'm trying to make sure he knows it's not his fault and that it's not that I don't love him. But I moved in with him a month ago, and I'm trying to figure that out because it's very different than living alone and visiting him.

We're talking about therapy when we can afford it. We both agree this is not an end the relationship issue, but it is something we need to talk out before we both start hating ourselves and getting upset at each other.

I just don't know what else to do in the mean time.

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u/Numerous-Canary-4801 — 8 days ago