Unsupportive mom sends critical texts every week
I have a 2-week-old baby boy and in the last 2 months of pregnancy, it became clear I was going to be on my own as my partner became verbally abusive, abused Adderall and kratom, and is now in rehab. We had a wedding and a few days later everything crumbled- he lies, cheats, and doesn’t go to his jobs so he’s contributed nothing financially. Found out his parents had been covering rent. So now I’m scrambling to get assistance, a cheap apt, and a job. I was going to job fairs and interviews the days before giving birth.
I’ve taken all suggestions and advice but it’s never enough for my pushy mom. Her latest wall of text below in bold with context.
“We determine today whether [MIL] has someone coming…you or I will make contact. Your choice.”
(My partner went nuts and fell through ceiling of our rental house so MIL has to repair damage. She said she had someone coming soon but idk when exactly. Mom keeps nagging.)
“We will help you if you make good choices and give us respect but if you just plan to continue bringing more problems to our home at this stage of our life with no respect or gratitude Then you need to plan a future for yourself independently.”
(She often says how could you get in this situation?? Blames me. Funny enough, she got pregnant with my abusive alcoholic father and was rescued by my grandma buying us a house.)
“I can’t tell you how devastating those texts you sent from the night before last to me were..I would never say those things about a baby they are helpless and your mind said dump him. I know the pressure is enormous alone but to blame him. He didn’t ask to be brought into a turbulent situation. And now we wait for [partner] to do more harm.”
(We had a rough night and I was sending texts like “the lil shit, he pooped the bed!” “I’m ready to drop him at the firehouse.” I was really crying out for help.)
“I would like to encourage you to strive for a good career for you and [baby boy] but I see no drive from you…I see someone just existing and waiting for whatever to happen next…please tell me I’m wrong I want to be wrong. We all joyfully put on your wedding hopeful for your future.”
(I guess I have to detail every call and email and job assessment I take or she assumes I’m doing nothing.)