Former friend invited herself to my wedding. How do I approach this?
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I (27f) am getting married this July and I'm really excited. I used to be best friends with this girl (28), but we haven't talked in years. We never had a big falling out, we just grew distant over covid and whenever I suggested meeting up she would either postpone last second or stand me up. Decided to take the hint and stopped reaching out. So at this point we haven't spoken in probably 3 years.
Last night she sent me a picture of a dress and asked if it's formal enough for my wedding. We have no common friends, I don't post on social media and neither does my fiancé, so how does she know I'm getting married?
I'm not a confrontational person at all and find this entire situation painfully awkward. I'd appreciate advice on how to approach her without coming across as some bitter bridezilla. I don't want her at my wedding and I'm baffled she's just planning on showing up. I want to call her this week and talk to her about it. She had a habit of leaving me on read for weeks on end and I'd rather not feel anxious waiting for a response via text. Thanks!
Update: hope I'm doing this right. I hadn't considered she might be someone's +1 and many people suggested that possibility, so I sent her a friendly message asking if she was. Roughly translated: "Oh hi! The dress looks lovely. Are you accompanying one of my guests? I'm surprised you messaged and want to make sure we're on the same page". She responded with a ? so I called her.
Turns out she isn't anyone's date. A relative of hers I know works with my sister. I had no clue they were working together, but she apparently overheard my sister talking about my wedding and relayed the info to my former friend. No big deal, relieved she isn't anyone's date!
To her we were still friends and she figured I wouldn't mind her at the wedding. As one lovely comment put it: I had to put my big girl panties on and told her that I had loved her dearly in the past, but she has shown me many times that I can't really mean all that much to her if I'm not worth responding to or get stood up when we set up a meeting. I told her that it's actually really bizarre of her to think that she would be invited to my wedding after years of no contact. She suggested meeting up again and talking about our friendship in person, but I really wasn't interested and told her as much. Wished her all the best and told her there were no hard feelings, hung up and blocked her.
Not very exciting, but I'm super grateful to everyone who gave me great advice on how to approach this!