u/NewRecognition9885

My wife and I (both 37) have been married 13 years and have 4 kids.

Recently, I offered to make her tea, and she said it made her uncomfortable because of a news story about husbands drugging their wives.

I was honestly surprised and felt hurt by that, because I’ve never done anything like that or given her a reason to feel unsafe.

I told her it bothered me that she would associate me with something like that. She responded that she’s allowed to have her feelings and that I shouldn’t take it personally.

Now I’m stuck between wanting to respect her feelings, but also feeling hurt and a bit confused.

AITA for pushing back and telling her that it upset me?

I (M37) and my wife (F37) have been married for 13 years. We have 4 kids together. My wife said to me tonight that me asking her if she wants me to make her tea is triggering because of the recent cnn story that broke about the husbands who drugged their wives with tea and then raped them ( look it up it’s messed up)

I was first of all shocked then I honestly got upset. We’ve been married for 13 years and never once did I even think of doing that. I confronted her about this after reflecting on the fact that I was super bothered by her comment. I said look i just gotta say Im super offended that you would lump me in with men like that. Her response was that she needs to have her feelings and it not offend me. AITAH for basically telling her that it’s bull shit for her to even think that way? I’m genuinely shocked right now. Like, I have read so many stories of women cheating on their husbands but never thought well she is a cheater bc these other women are…? If that makes sense?

I said at one point maybe she needs screened for autism because she doesn’t even see how that could be offensive to me. Perhaps that was rude , but I’m honestly thinking she may be slightly autistic because she just can’t understand how I could be offended. Social cues are just not there.

I don’t understand why I am not allowed to make tea for my wife without it causing trigger event. I’m not even sure what to do atp.