I need help setting boundaries
Here is my background, I'm in my 40s. I have cheated on my wife 3 times. I always had this problem since my teenage years. Before, I was thinking that long term relationship is just not right for me. But the last cheating happened this week and after that I really don't feel like the sex was necessary. (I even had sex with my wife in the morning before I hooked up with a random person) It feels like the high that I'm getting is what I am chasing. I can now confirm I have sex addiction.
However, I have no other addiction, I hardly drink, non drug users, no gambling issues. I am a very self controlled person. I like to have a plan before doing anything.
I have decided that I am going to change my life this week but I need help setting the boundaries.
I already deleted everything on my 2nd phone. Doing the same on my computer. I will no longer talk to other women and hook up.
As far as porn, I only watch it once or twice a week and masturbate once or twice a week. Is that acceptable? Or should I cut out that interaction as well?
Is having sexual thought on random person you see being ok?
I'm not into religion, and don't want to go to a in person meeting. What else should I do to improve my chances of success?