u/NICEacct111

This predicament isn't limited to narc parents, but I'll type anyways. I have made multiple posts here about how my parents have a bizarre and narrow worldview, which rejects a lot of things on a theoretical, ideological level. In real life, my parents reject a lot of things as well. Now, I have to preface this post by saying that it's normal and natural to reject bad things (for instance, I like to window shop, and obviously there are many ads and items that I see but do not buy for all sorts of reasons). However, excessively rejecting something out of pickiness probably leads to both a lack of progress and pain of some kind. For instance, I remember that my mom would argue with her sister (who lives many states away from where I live) that her son shouldn't marry a certain professional due to their different ethnicity and faith (I'm definitely not arguing for discrimination; just giving context). That sister was very upset and brought up how my cousin had tried looking for a specific type of partner for quite some time and was unable to find that supposedly ideal person. In the end, my cousin got married around a year ago, and they then had a kid too. From what I know, it seems like that relationship is good and they are both high earners, so they're financially stable.

If I recall correctly, I think my mom went even further at some point, suggesting that my cousin shouldn't be friends with a certain ethnicity. That aunt countered back by mentioning that if my cousin were to be restricted in such a manner, he would hardly have any options left for close friendships (at least within his field of practice). Having preferences is one thing, but trying to impose your preference onto everyone in your orbit is not warranted. Rant over.

When I'm trying to say is that if I'm able to complete an assignment by brute force (e.g., staying up late, sacrificing other activities), I feel like I forget a lot of what I did. For instance, I was able to do a multi-page essay with multiple credible sources on time a couple of semesters ago at my school, but I still feel uncomfortable writing such a long prompt. I think my issue isn't even limited to writing a term paper, but also with a lot of other academic endeavors. I guess I have an issue with retention (I remember my organic chemistry professor from community college told me to review my notes and online homework more often to retain the information). Has anyone else experienced this or relate to this?

I know this isn't a career or job based subreddit, but I would argue that my parents are partially to blame for my predicament and confusion on what I should try to do for a living. For context, my parents thought I was going to be a superstar in school and become a clinician (e.g., dentist, physician). Long story short, I sadly couldn't handle the courses and flunked out of a uni many years ago. Lately, my dad seemingly (and begrudgingly) is slightly flexible on what path I should take, such as accounting or finance. The funny thing about this conversation is that my dad acknowledged that such a career pivot is very difficult for me because we all thought about STEM and healthcare roles for quite a lot of years and put so many resources into the endeavor (e.g., money, time, sanity).

Obviously, I have my weaknesses, flaws, and vulnerabilities, which makes finding a desired and compatible career very hard for me. I just wish that when I was younger, my parents would have let me do in-depth brainstorming on career paths and allowed me to physically explore what those roles would be like. Rant over.

I know people will say that young people are too glued to their screens and get "brainrot" and consume "AI slop." I get those criticisms. However, I'm asking a deeper question: do people with disabilities, such as me, get lost and immersed in such activities in order to get away from problems and have a moment of peace and tranquility? Some people will say that this type of coping mechanism is wrong and perhaps delusional, but I don't think it's wrong to play a video game or daydream while listening to music in response to suffering discrimination or a failure in an endeavor. Obviously, if such activities cost too much money, take up too much time, take up too much space, or otherwise harm a person, then they become invalid and wrong.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that for a person with a disability, or someone going through a difficult experience, it's natural and understandable to want to be able to deal with the resulting psychological trauma in a subtle, peaceful way. Can anyone else relate to this?