I’ve discovered that I only want to date gay men but I’m very uncomfortable approaching them
Recently I’ve been avoiding dating due to school and moving around a lot. I’ve been on a couple dating apps but I struggled finding people there I was attracted to. Recently a friend of mine, who is a very stereotypical gay guy, inviting me to have a threesome with him and his boyfriend. I was surprised because as far as I know they both only dated cis men, but I agreed because I was bored and find them both attractive.
I had a great time and I’m realizing after the fact that I am far more attracted to very feminine gay men. The problem is I’m not sure I would ever feel comfortable approaching them. I’m on T and already had top surgery but I’m still very androgynous in appearance. I only pass about half the time and I don’t plan on getting bottom surgery due to cost and issues with wound healing in the past.
I am open to dating bi/pan people but in my experience most men who present and act very femininely have been gay, and are interested in much more masculine men or exclusively bottom. I know there are gay men out there who are open to dating trans men, but they seem rare, especially in a small conservative town. I’m not sure if it’s internalized transphobia or a fear of rejection but even on dating apps I usually skip over anyone who labels themselves as gay. I’m not sure how to go about dating or feeling more comfortable approaching someone I’m attracted to.