I always had a hard time finding the perfect amount of friendliness/physical affection/ways to show my love in friendships. I am either too distant physically and people find me cold and/or think that i dont like them or on the opposite I am too tactile, friendly, close physically and people think i am interested sexually or flirting with them. This has caused me alot of issues in my life. I got disliked or on the opposite, some guys thought I was interested and did things to me thinking it was mutual and that I was consenting.
This weekend I went out with one of my male best friends, who I've known for 10 + years. I thought he understood me and that my affection, even if sometimes too much, was 100% not romantic or sexual. We got out, I had too much to drink and decided to go to sleep on his couch. When I woke up in the morning, he was sleeping on the couch with me, spooning me.. in his underwear. I woke up very confused and left the apartment right away.
One important thing to mention is that he too is neurodivergent, he is Bipolar and ADHD, and sometimes he does things out of character when he's a bit too drunk or not sober...
Now I don't know how to go about the situation. I keep wondering if I was more tactile than usual without realizing it? I genuinely have no idea. I feel uncomfortable speaking to him... He has tried to reach out like nothing happened, like he doesn't think he did anything weird or wrong. I am also in a very committed long term relationship and he's close friend with my boyfriend (I told my bf about all of it right way, no secret between us).
How should I go about this? Should I pardon him? Am I overthinking this?