u/MentalMentalino

I (35 m) met someone off the apps (31 f) that I really liked but just got a text that confused me.

We initially chatted for 4-5 days and finally met for dinner. Had a great first date where we ended up going somewhere else after and kept chatting. Light flirting, heavy touching actually lol but never kissed and I didn‘t pursue it because I liked easing into it to build it naturally.

That tension got me a 2nd date 3 days later. We did a movie and ended up at my place after. Lots of personal discussions sort of fast tracking getting to know each other.

Two days later she wanted to see me after work before I left for town 4 days. Mostly to hookup and chat a but after.

Throughout all of this and while I was gone 4 days lots of texting about being glad to have met, wanting to do a concert date at the end of the month, excited for potential summer travel/dates, looking forward to the next date, etc. all of it.

Then I come back from my trip and ask if she is free this week to see me before another trip I had scheduled (which she’s known about). And out the blue she sent:

I don’t think I’m in a good mental place to date at this moment. I enjoyed my time with you and wish you the best. I’m sorry if this feels abrupt I’ve just been having a hard time with some things personally and don’t have the capacity for anything more. 

A complete shock to me considering what we’ve said to each other. I was respectful and just said thanks for telling me, etc.

I know I should move on but also the unresolved/abrupt nature has me wanting to “try” or text her again in like a month or so..idk..thoughts?

I (35 m) met someone off the apps (31 f) that I really liked but just got a text that confused me.

We initially chatted for 4-5 days and finally met for dinner. Had a great first date where we ended up going somewhere else after and kept chatting. Light flirting, heavy touching actually lol but never kissed and I didn‘t pursue it because I liked easing into it to build it naturally.

That tension got me a 2nd date 3 days later. We did a movie and ended up at my place after. Lots of personal discussions sort of fast tracking getting to know each other.

Two days later she wanted to see me after work before I left for town 4 days. Mostly to hookup and chat a but after.

Throughout all of this and while I was gone 4 days lots of texting about being glad to have met, wanting to do a concert date at the end of the month, excited for potential summer travel/dates, looking forward to the next date, etc. all of it.

Then I come back from my trip and ask if she is free this week to see me before another trip I had scheduled (which she’s known about). And out the blue she sent:

I don’t think I’m in a good mental place to date at this moment. I enjoyed my time with you and wish you the best. I’m sorry if this feels abrupt I’ve just been having a hard time with some things personally and don’t have the capacity for anything more. 

A complete shock to me considering what we’ve said to each other. I was respectful and just said thanks for telling me, etc.

I know I should move on but also the unresolved/abrupt nature has me wanting to “try” or text her again in like a month or so..idk..thoughts?

I've been in marketing for 13+ years, mostly in growth and performance marketing. I've managed large paid media budgets, built channels from scratch, managed small teams, and been promoted at every company I've worked at.

On paper it's a strong career. In practice, I'm starting to feel like I'm running the same playbook over and over.

The problem is growth marketing pays well and I'm decent at it. But I'm not sure I want to be optimizing Meta campaigns and staring at CAC targets when I'm 40, 50, etc. I don't hate the work but I don't love it either. It's becoming purely transactional for me.

For context I also spent 4 years in the music industry doing artist management before pivoting into marketing. That pivot worked out financially but I sometimes wonder if I traded fulfillment for stability.

I'm curious what people in similar positions have done. A few questions:

- For those who left growth marketing, what did you pivot to and do you regret it?

- Are there adjacent roles (strategy, ops, product, rev ops, consulting) that pay comparably without the same burnout cycle?

- Has anyone successfully transitioned out of marketing entirely into something completely different? What did that look like?

I'm mid 30s, based in USA, open to remote. No kids, no mortgage, so I have some flexibility. I just don't have a clear picture of what the next 10 years looks like and I'd rather figure it out now than at 40.

Appreciate any real talk. Not looking for "follow your passion" advice. Looking for practical paths from people who've actually made a move.

I'm struggling to find a new job, hence this post. I know the market is shit right now but it's starting to make me wonder about things longer-term too.