AITA for telling my mother I’ll only have breakfast with her on Mother’s Day if she comes alone?
Hi Charlotte, I love you!
Anyways my(25 F) mother(49 F) and I were estranged from since I was a baby, we didn’t have a close relationship while I was growing up and I was raised by my paternal grandparents. Fast forward to high school, I always tried to be closer to her but it always seemed like I’d always get the smaller piece. I have two other sisters from my mom, let’s call them Karen(32 F) and Kendra (21 F) who my mom raised, and we’re not really close cause I lived on the other side of town.
So I’ve been running away from my mom for years, because she lied about me to my grandparents and made my teen years hell, but I decided it’s been a decade and I have to move on. Last year I moved in with my sisters and got a job in a call centre agency, along with my little sister Kendra. We all 3 have driver’s license but I’m scared of driving. I think this fear comes from all those accidents my mom has been in and how messed up she’d look every time she’d video chat me from the hospital, so I don’t drive whatsoever. Kendra on the other hand is a great driver, she loves being behind the wheels. So Karen would borrow us her car and we would drive her to work, then Kendra would drive me to work before taking herself.
So one day we’re headed to work, and we’re late, and the car gets bumped. We head to my work place and Kendra gets off to check the car. She tells me it’s ok so I don’t bother getting off to check it myself, and eventually when I get off I head straight into the building. Later that evening when my shift was over, I spot Karen in the parking lot and she’s raging from anger. She cusses me out and asked me what happened to her car, i was confused at first but the closer I got to her I saw a dent, and quickly remembered this morning’s incident. I immediately apologised and told her we got bumped this morning but Kendra checked on the car and said that it was ok. Out of anger she kept cussing me out and saying I’m irresponsible and that I’ll find my way to work from now on, I kept quiet because I knew I was in the wrong (for not making sure Kendra wasn’t lying about the dent)
So we get “home” (lol) and Kendra is balling her eyes out, asking me why I wasn’t answering my messages all day. I tell her work was busy and she says i should just check my phone. So I go sit outside while checking my phone and my flabbers were gasted, Karen kept cussing Kendra out and she told Kendra “you guys need to get the f out of my house”, that’s when I knew this was personal. So we have dinner and we sleep, and the next morning at 5AM I’m woken by Karen asking me when I’ll be leaving her house? Excuse me? I try explaining that I called my father and he doesn’t have money to uber me home or even gas to come get me, and she said, “I don’t care, don’t tell me excuses” I’m a big softie so that definitely hurt my feelings, I just said “ok” and covered my head and started crying
Kendra wakes up to me crying and she asked me what was wrong and I told her, she didn’t even say sorry but I was being mistreated because of her. Actually, she was getting princess treatment in my presence, I felt like an outsider. They had her install hair, and even gave her money to go party with her friends. So I leave eventually and I go back to my dad’s, write my resignation letter and I was unemployed all over again. Fast forward a few weeks, I’m watching instagram stories and I see Kendra at Karen’s apartment, I ask both of them wtf? Karen doesn’t respond but Kendra lies and says she’s just visiting with her best friend Chloe because Chloe’s sister had to go somewhere. Mind you, Chloe’s sister has never had a problem with leaving them by themselves so I knew this was cap. So I chill, two weeks later i see that she’s still there, so I ask Chloe and she tells me that Kendra was never kicked out, i was heartbroken and I blocked both of them. They didn’t even realise til like 4 months later when Karen saw a post of mine on TikTok about a women who stabbed me and she asked if we’re still together, and I blocked her on that platform that instant.
So I’ve been no contact with them since last year September. Fast forward to this year, i was graduating on the 8th of May and I had little to no money for a celebration, my mom wanted us to celebrate. Last night (9th May) she calls me and asked to meet up for Mother’s Day, and I told her I was down. Then she called and asked me to come to my sister’s house so we could have a braai and I said no, I told her I wouldn’t be coming to Karen’s house. She then said she’ll ask Karen and Kendra to meet us at a mall, and again, i said no. I told her I wouldn’t be coming if Karen and Kendra are there and if she tries to trick me into being there and inviting them, I will be leaving without an explanation. I could hear she was shocked and heartbroken but she agreed to my boundaries and my terms.
I had breakfast with my mother on her own, so AITA for telling my mother I’ll only have breakfast with her on Mother’s Day if she comes alone?