I feel completely broken and don’t know how to get out of this hole
so I don’t even know where to start but I just need to get this out.
I’ve been in a dead end relationship for like 5 years now and around the same time I started this sales job that was supposed to be my big career move, best paying job I ever had. but I got stuck in a territory that just kinda sucks, we lost a ton of products that used to sell well in my area and every year I just keep declining
I spent two years applying to other jobs. like 250 maybe 300 applications and nothing came even close to what I make now. tried city jobs, tried getting into trades, nobody wants to pick me up because my experience doesn’t really fit since the new year I just feel completely done. like I can’t even get myself to apply to anything anymore. I’ve basically checked out at work and somehow the pressure keeps getting worse every week. I took a whole week vacation and still couldn’t move. couldn’t do anything
I’ve gained 40 pounds since I started this job. lost basically all my friends because of this relationship. the gym stuff I used to love just doesn’t exist for me anymore. I have zero energy like literally 24 hours a day my body just feels weak and heavy and I’m pretty sure my depression has gotten really bad I’m 34 with not much saved and I just feel so lost
does anyone have any advice on how to even start getting control back because I genuinely don’t know what to do anymore