u/Matter-Street

Over the past 12 months my knee has gone out more than three times. At first I thought I’d dislocated it. I popped it back in the first two times no problem and I was up and running immediately. The last time it was about eight weeks ago, and I tried just seeing what would happen naturally. Well, it just got worse and worse and worse, and I still cannot bend it all the way I had a boot on it for a few weeks. I have to wear knee braces all the time.
I have been very active most of my life. I played pickle ball the last six years I have hiked probably five days a week for most of my adult life due to my work. I’ve never had any problems with my joints. I’ve never broken a bone. I do handstands every day.
You won’t catch me dead in a gym, but my body needs to move for my mental health. I joke that I’m like a dog who needs to be walked every day.

Well, as you can imagine, it has been very challenging to not be able to be mobile. So much energy trapped inside my body from being still.
I’m not walking with crutches walker or a cane anymore, so it is slowly getting better, but I still cannot bend it. And it pops when I walk.

I’d love to hear any of your experiences

I’m 56 years young and my teenage daughter is going off to college in the fall.
Her K through 12 Charter School has been the one through line in her life. I have been trying to implement a weekly set time for her and I to meet for either lunch dinner something. I’ve been trying to do this for as long as I can remember and I just can’t get it to Stick. I know being flexible is most effective in retaining the very close connection that we have. I sometimes feel she only makes time for me when it’s convenient for her is going through a hard time or need something from me. If I had a parent that only saw me when they needed something from me or when they were having a rough time that would suck. As a matter of fact, that is not too far off from the relationship that her dad has with her.
Commitment isn’t something I’ve always been great at myself. With her however it’s different. She’s my only true relative by blood as I’m adopted. The people that adopted me when I was young, were not at all warm or loving or connected in any way for that matter. I am estranged from them for over a decade this last time. I wanted her to feel that she was important to me.
I wonder if I’m doing her a disservice for always being available to her when she isn’t able or willing to.

Please know that I understand that she is a teenager with a very rich social life and she’s her own person. I think it would be creepy if she dropped everything to “be there for me”
I guess I wanted her to understand the value of Family since she has a very tiny one with just her dad and I and neither of us have parents. She’s done a great job of cultivating Beautiful groups of friends and their families and other adults in her life.

And the irony is, I totally understand the challenge of HAVING to do something when you’re not really feeling it either.
I also don’t want her to do the obligatory family appointments that I’ve seen so many of my peers throughout life be indebted to.

Thoughts ?