u/Massive-Reporter9804

I found this little guy two weeks ago. No one has come forward to claim him, no calls to the shelter or animal control, no microchip, no hits on the fb post- mainly people telling me to beware of people claiming to be the owner because of how sought after this breed is. I think it’s safe to say we have a new member of the family. I grew up with my mother being a very irresponsible pet owner, and I haven’t had pets in a very long time. My children adore this little baby and I want to treat him just like I do my kiddos. I am a little overwhelmed with all of the decisions I need to make (food, bedding, training (he did come potty trained and has very decent manners) and grooming). I want to come to y’all and see if there’s anything you would like to share as experienced Peke owners.

I want to add what I’ve been doing so far-

- he wakes up with me at 5:20am to get kids ready for school, immediately goes outside to potty then comes back inside to towel dry and clean water bowl
-After I get the last kid on the bus around 6:15am, I feed him two fistfuls of nutrish salmon and sweet potato food (barely covers bottom of bowl) then another two fistfuls of food around 4pm
- I try to get him outside 30 min after the eats to see if he has to potty, I heard they require a lot of potty breaks
- I have a younger child who plays with him and wears him out so he ends up napping quite a bit
- I bought three different kinds of brushes, I use the one with the button mainly. I had to cut out quite a few mats, and I trimmed his leg and paw hairs
- he has on a new seresto for small dogs but I am still seeing ticks although not as much as when he first came to us
- he mainly stays inside but I have a fenced porch that leads into a fenced backyard that he likes to hangout on with us (I did see that when temps go above 80°F to limit outside time to 15min, and when summer hits only outside to potty

That’s about it, I haven’t taken him to the vet yet but he was checked out at the shelter and was confirmed 1-1.5 year old male in tact and healthy. I have no idea if he was an escapee from a bad breeding situation or what the heck happened because I cannot imagine losing him and not doing everything I could to find him. He’s an amazing dog.

I cannot get over my anger. It seems like he’s completely moved on and acts as if I should do the same. He doesn’t say it, of course not. His words are all affirming and sympathetic. It’s been almost 3 months. He still has the blockers on his phone but that’s the only thing that has stuck. No more therapy, no more reading his self help books, no more podcasts, no more d2c. To be fair I have been dissociating from the real work as well but I don’t feel that the onus should be on me to fix this. I logically know it isn’t but it’s all just so confusing. I want to give up and I feel like we almost switched roles, I’m being avoidant and defensive and I’ve been binge watching any bravo show I can. He even watches with me and I don’t even care that it’s mostly women in bikinis. He hardly initiates sex and when he does I can hardly ever orgasm, surprisingly not because he doesn’t try… it still makes me upset with him and then there’s even more pressure. Mother’s Day is coming up and I am trying so hard to stay present and not be preemptively disappointed. I just feel like I’ve seen too much and I can’t go back to thinking he was this amazing person anymore. I used to feel so lucky and now I feel burdened. I feel like if I told him how I truly felt he would not be able to come back from it either. I don’t know if these feelings are even true, since it hasn’t been 6 months and they say not to make drastic decisions until that time has passed… UGH I’m sorry for the rambling mess but I needed to get this out. No one understands besides you all. It’s a blessing and a curse.

Found wandering Pekingese