Hi I'd like some advice!
(I'm a 15F, my friend is two years younger)
So, one time I woke up from a nap one day and I saw that I got tagged In a discord server
I thought it was my friend who tagged me, so I asked her if she tagged me
I asked her 2 times (I responded to a message and tagged her once if I remember correctly), and then a random guy who's 19M and claims my friend as his littler sister, replies to me saying in French "I did, is there a problem?" and I respond along the lines of "No, I just wanted to know" (I don't remember what I said but it is along the lines of that!)
He started insulting me and we got into an argument.
I didn't care at first,. He said that my friend isn't my best friend and that he's her best friend and etc
And then he said that my friend doesn't want to be my friend, that I should leave her alone, poor her, and that I'm bothering her—which did sting because friendship is a hard topic for me.
At some point I said that I never wanted to argue and that I'd rather be friends, and then he said that nobody wants to be friends with me
Again, friendship was a hard topic so that blow hit hard
Also he said he'll fuck my sister which is Hella weird.
I did leave the server after.
I also did talk to her in her dms in the middle of the argument, after the argument too.
She said she'd talk to him and I did doubt it at first until a few days passed and she sent me the server link and told me to join so we could call.
And I didn't want to at first
She told me that she stopped being friends with him because he insulted people too much, and that he left the server
(which I read that last part wrong and thought she said that he permanently left, but I missed on an important detail where she said he isn't connected)
Days pass and she resent the link again and I joined it this time
Okay now even more days pass and now it's present day
So today I got tagged by my friend because she wanted me to talk
Okay so I started talking and then someone replies to me, saying "do you remember me" in french again
And after a while of saying I don't remember, he refreshed my memory by something he said in the past
And I was over that argument anyway, so instead of shying away I just annoyed him back
Now there was this other person who said that they supported Israel, at first I thought it was a joke but it wasn't so I started to debate with them
I was lagging so I couldn't debate to full extent because it was hard to reply
But I did send a large text about some things that Israel did
And he said that they were just defending thesmeleo
Okay I went off topic a bit sorry
So, later on I just dropped the debate because the person wasn't taking it seriously
Now another person replied to me saying "25$ and he starts being pro palestine" which I acknowledged as a joke ofc, and I made a joke back saying "Nah let him stay like that, I ain't rich"
Then the person (the one that didn't take the debate seriously) said "25$ cheese pizza" which was a reference of a popular influencer called "Clavicular" who bought 25$ worth of Cp
And I responded by "Yeah I get the ref, glad he's in jail now"
And the person started saying that they would bail him out if they could.
And after a small while I tagged the 19yr old guy and said along the lines of "is this your disciple or what?" as Joke and fully expecting him to decline, which I now realize I was indirectly associating him with a pred (i think, please tell me if I did because I'm not too sure and if I did I really didn't mean too!)
He replied and said yes
And then I gave him context and he said along the lines that he has eyes and can read, which normally indicates that he has read the convo (correct me if I'm wrong and if it does or does not indicate it)
We then got into an argument, and I did insult him back
At some point he started insulting my mom and included my sister (again)
And I have never mentioned his family, because they didn't do anything
I did call him pred and "incel bitch", in the argument, which was wrong from me
I shouldn't have been insulting but It was in the heat of the moment, but I still shouldn't have insulted
So that's the context (sorry if it was super long, also he doesn't like me, because he just doesn't like me)
And my friend hasn't checked up on my, and etc
And I want to bring it up to her about how she kinda lied about not being friends with him and how she genuinely just didn't even defend me (I know her irl and he doesn't)
I mean yeah, she isn't obligated to defend me but she could've at least told him to stop
But she said that she wasn't online (not sure if I believe it or not)
I'm a bit bothered and a little sad about the fact that she still hasn't reached out and I don't want to bother her with this subject again
What do I do? And any advice for the future
Like any type of advice, like how to handle future arguments, how to keep calm and etc
Okay thanks for reading!!!
(also not too harsh with the advice, I'm kinda sensitive/soft hearted or whatever the word is!!)