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I've read the 'Am I demisexual FAQ' thing but I really just need confirmation from a demisexual. I've made a similar post about this before but I think went over the top in details and deleted it out of frustration. Having a sexual identity crisis is vexing but I would appreciate some insight
So I’ve been really confused about my sexuality for a while (I thought I knew but here are) , and I’m starting to notice a pattern that doesn’t quite fit what I thought before.
I can recognise when someone is physically attractive. I can look at someone and think “they’re really good looking.” But when it comes to actually being in a sexual situation, I’ve had consistent issues where I can’t maintain an erection, even if I think they’re the “hottest person in the world.”
At first I thought it was performance anxiety. I went from thinking I was straight, then gay, then bisexual… because it all kind of felt the same physically in those situations.
When I have an emotional connection with someone, everything changes. The anxiety disappears, my body responds normally, and intimacy actually becomes a turn-on instead of something I’m overthinking.
I also realised I might have been confusing physical attraction with sexual attraction this whole time.
Another thing is I genuinely don’t think I could do hookups, even if I wanted to. It’s not just a preference, it feels like my body just doesn’t work that way without some kind of connection.
So yeah… I’m just trying to understand if this lines up with being demisexual, or if it could still be something like performance anxiety.
Thanks for reading anyway