My husband and I have a hit a rough patch with communication. I know it’s common for marriages to go through rough spots but I feel like we are at each other more the last few months and we talk at each other more than to each other. We have an almost 3 year old daughter but nothing has changed in the last 6 months to put all this stress on our marriage. My husband and I have both confided in his dad and mom who are strong Christian’s because neither of us want divorce. I have friends and parents but have never shared with anyone except his parents cause I know how much my husband respects them. His dad had mentioned awhile back that it would be good if we could go see a counselor and just get help communicating.
Truthfully I know my husband loves me, but I don’t feel like he likes me. I have to initiate every kiss, he doesn’t want me using the master bathroom and tells me to go use a spare bathroom, and he is constantly negative about me. For example, he told me that I needed to weigh to see if I was gaining weight. I have been back to my pre baby weight since our daughter was 18 months and I’ve never had a weight problem. I told him I had actually joined a free weight loss class that a couple of my friends are trying out. He then proceeded to tell me how that it was a waste of time cause I’m out of shape and can’t do it. I work full time as a middle school History teacher and I have told him how I need help around the house with. Toddler and me working. He never helps but proceeds to tell me how I don’t do things efficiently to what he thinks. I tell him if he would just help clean or put laundry in the washing machine it would help. He never will but wants me to keep working for the income.
Last night his mom was sick but his dad available to talk. His parents go to therapy together and have said how they love it even if no problems are going on. I talked to his dad (my husband always says how much he respects his dad and has even confided in him about some communication problems we have) because I thought if his dad helped me find a counselor, maybe he would be more open to it. It wouldn’t just be someone that I found like I’m trying to fix him and thought if his dad helped, my husband would be way more open to it. So I spoke to my husband and before I could even finish my thought, he got so mad at me saying he loses respect for me everytime I go to his dad…I was shocked because 1 he also goes to his dad and 2 I have only gone to his for advice 4 times in our 6 year marriage with last night making the 4th. I told him I think we just needed to go to counseling 2-3 times to get communication tools. He said he wasn’t having this conversation with me, said no to counseling and is now so mad at me. I’m honestly so confused.