I feel like I’m spiraling
I’m 34F. I was in a relationship and married and was divorced suddenly after 9 years together. The divorce was in 2024 over two years ago. I thought I was over it. I hadn’t cared about anything I’d heard about my ex over these last couple of years up until about three days ago. It was my birthday. I was having a great day and I had heard from my mom that she thinks my ex and his new partner are married now. I’m like okay and? And brushed it off. Well for some reason my brain cannot stop thinking about that and it’s like the pain from the initial breakup is resurfacing again after I thought I was over it. I’m literally going insane and I have no idea why. I thought I was okay but seeing my ex live a happy life without me has made all the pain come back full throttle. I’ve been trying to keep my mind focused on other things but it doesn’t always work for me. I can’t talk to my therapist right now due to unpaid therapy bills and idk where else to turn to.