u/Low_World9204

In 2024 my mom facetimed me to let me know she was diagnosed with cancer. She said that doctors found a tumor and that it's fast growing. I cried of course because cancer is a touchy subject in my family because we've had multiple family members diagnosed and died from different cancers. When she was telling me she seemed oddly calm and almost excited to tell me (which i took as maybe the news hasn't been fully processed by her yet). After she told me this she said verbatim "I just wanted to be open and honest about my health to you". She also mentioned how she was frustrated with my dad for 'not taking it seriously' which I naturally took her side, because up til this point I didn't really have any reason not to trust her. Fast forward a few months later at thanksgiving I see my sister (who I'm no/low contact with) I approach her to pretty much talk about how we can both support my mom with her diagnosis. Immediately my sister goes "cancer?" and explains how my mom's doctor hasn't actually diagnosed her with cancer. They said she has a small mass and they weren't sure whether it was a tumor or something else, but they said it's so small that they'd have to wait for it to see whether it grows over the next couple of months before making that diagnosis. I was dumbfounded because I had been calling my mom almost every week since she told me the news and she had been talking with me about her doctors visits and how she's considering doing chemo spot injection vs. surgerical removal. After I found this out I asked my mom what exactly the doctor said and she tried to back track saying "well they still need to wait to confirm whether its a tumor". I had a hard time processing my feelings because her health was still a concern to me but at the same time it felt like she lied to me in a way. I went a month without talking to her because i was just in shock that she's do something like this. A few months after that they confirmed it was cancer but it was very early stage and they were able to remove it surgically. I went to visit her during her surgery to be there for support. But I havent really talked as much to her since. mainly cause I just don't trust her. I felt like she tried to pit me against my dad and I feel like she was using her cancer diagnosis as a way to get attention (which I felt bad for thinking this but she told all of her friends and myself before she was even officially diagnosed). Also us having so many people who had cancer it's surprising to me that she's do something like this. At times I feel like I'm making a big deal out of this, but I can't help but think if she could do something like this how many other things has she omitted or twisted truth. Also, she's a therapist, so it feels like there's really no excuse for her behavior. But idk, it's been a few months and she keeps trying to connect with me, but honestly it's hard for me to talk to her especially since she hasn't really taken any accountablity.