Hi, English isn't my first language, but I need some opinions and critiques to help me.
I'm a 19-year-old university student. I'm an introvert and have a few friends. I'm studying engineering, so there aren't many women in my class, and I only have one female friend. I've always believed that friends are important at every stage of life, and I try to cherish them and maintain our friendship.
My other friend is more extroverted and has a larger group of friends, so I feel like I'm in the way when I'm with her and we go off with her group because I'm shy and don't get along very well.
We don't get along badly, and most of the time I try to talk to them, but they already know each other and have their own dynamic, so it's a little difficult to fit in. I became friends with this person in my first semester, and we've been inseparable ever since, but recently I feel like she's changed me a bit because of them. I try to talk to other people, and I have more friends, but I felt like she was my first choice, and now I feel left out.
This feeling that he's changed is awful, and I don't know what to do. He's also been a bit distant with me. I'm trying to make new friends, but the other two girls are in the same group as my friend, so it's not possible right now. I talk to my male friends, but they also have their own groups, so I feel like I'm the only one alone.
I'd like to know what I could do to feel better. I've been crying a lot these days because of it, and it feels bad knowing I'll spend the next day alone. I appreciate that they're also being nice to me, but I feel like they're not comfortable either. I want to be his friend, but I feel like it will take a lot of time and wear me down.
I don't want to go through university alone because it's not easy for me, and I know that's how the world is and friends are sometimes fleeting, but I would hate to be alone.
Sorry if this is too long and confusing.