Penalty cambro
***edit im done replying to everyone's dumbass remarks. Get the stick out yalls ass. I was just playing Bring me the horizon. no one actually cares as long I dont play screamo or folk punk. im done with this post. it was a fucking funny moment that everyone laughed about in the kitchen. yall weirdos took it too far with all the hate and down votes.
Im 34. Just had a birthday. I can't sleep. Need to be up in 6 hours for work. And the only thing I can think of is how I badly want to relapse and find a nice place to just end it. I have zero friends because I have multiple personality disorders and i was a horrible person before I grew up. Basically non contact with my family. Im homeless living in a tent. I gained over 50lbs in the last 8 months. I dont have enough money for therapy or my meds. Ive been off my meds for almost 2 years now. I was on multiple mood stabilizers. Old psych doctor said its dangerous to be get off but just couldnt afford them no more. I have no education so im working a job that pays enough to get me by. But too much to rely on goverment help. Even if the goverment would help considering I live in a very red state. Tbh if I go tonight who would miss me besides my GF? Dont even know how I managed to land her. She says "I see the potential in the man you're trying to be. And I want to be there when he shows up." Bunch of bull i dont think ill ever get there. Im over weight spiraling and slowly dying. Why prolong the inevitable. Tired of being homeless. Tired of being unstable. Tired of not having money. Just tired of surving. Been doing it since I was a kid. I want to live but never been given a chance. So if the universe wont let me live why stick around?