u/Lonely-Temporary-561

So this is long but, so many of the arguments I see in this sub about morality and the characters in this show are entirely pointless if you just view it from the proper perspective. I also see a lot of people say that the fans of the show typically have watched things like this or twilight as their main source of vampire information, but in my opinion, twilight is honestly a perfect example of why people view the vampire diaries entirely wrong.

First of all the show is called the VAMPIRE diaries, not the Elena or the human diaries. The show is about vampires, specifically the development and story of two brothers and the girl they both fell in love with. Elena is literally the only human being in a sea of supernatural creatures, and even then she’s still a supernatural form of human being. The constant discourse about how awful some of the vampires are from a human perspective when legitimately no one in the show is human or views things the same way, makes no sense.

For example in Twilight (we’ll address the movies here), Bella is the only human in a literal COVEN of vampires, and she very quickly realized the danger her being a mortal brought to not only her but the Cullens, which led to her asking Edward to turn her and following through with it as soon as he was willing to do it. Everyone supported that idea, no one called The Cullens a bunch of evil immoral villains, because it was pretty obvious she just wasn’t gonna survive nor would the Cullens if she wasn’t turned eventually. Rosalie’s character also got so much hate for being so against Bella giving up her humanity for Edward.

In most other vampire media, I don’t see people having NEARLY this much discourse arguing about what characters are horrible and immoral and why. It makes no sense. They are vampires, they are doing what vampires have always done in any rendition of vampires ever. If a lot of you consumed vampire media like True Blood, or the Buffy series, or 30 days of night, you would realize that vampires aren’t really depicted to have humanity/souls in most renditions of them, and the humanity switch is this shows way of addressing that but still allowing the characters to be normal enough to love and care about each other because it was a teen show.

The incessant shit talking about Damon, the arguments over who’s the better person, etc, is all so worn out, and if you actually knew anything about vampire culture you’d know the vampires in this show are ANGELS compared to how they act in most.

So 2 things, one my bf lied to me about cheating on one of his girlfriends, and I’ve noticed that he essentially entirely watches gay or trans porn. Specifically trans women who are pre op. I’ve specifically told him before im not a huge fan of porn consumption to begin with, but im having a hard time with the fact that it seems to be literally the only kind he watches. Not because I was unaware he sometimes watched trans women or care at all about that, but because he’s lied about it several times, claiming he doesn’t watch it that consistently, and all of the gay porn added into it just feels like there’s something more.

Our sex life sucks recently, and I’ve told him I feel this way, but nothing seems to change. I’m never proud to admit looking at a partners phone but I saw Twitter had added a history feature, and I know that’s where he watches his porn,low and behold it was full of entirely trans or gay porn videos. We’ve been together almost 4 years, and I feel like he definitely has some issues with sex, not in the sense where DURING sex he seems off, but in the sense where he goes through periods where he seems so insanely disinterested in me sexually.

I’m thinking about showing him what I found and telling him how I feel, and contemplating if I should even be with him anymore, but I don’t know if im wrong for that I guess. Would you feel weird about this? I understand porn can be about fantasy, but he consistently lies to me about it, and he’s never admitted to watching any gay porn at all. After this long with someone I don’t know how I feel about being lied to about such intimate things.