My boyfriend (20M) doesn’t know me (20F) and I proved it
My boyfriend (20M) and I (20F) have been dating for almost 3 years now. We met in High School and have been each others firsts in terms of everything.
Recently, my friend (let’s call her Selena) hosted a birthday party with all the girls. We played a game of “Who knows Selena the most” created by her boyfriend. While playing the game I got sad because I realized that if I ever played a me version of this game, I felt as if my boyfriend would get last place.
I told my boyfriend about this feeling of mine because I always felt as if he never truly knew me. He said he does know me and even challenged me to ask him the questions.
I asked him the most BASIC questions ever. Like
- What’s my dream travel destination (not specific, just vague like the beach, the mountains, city, etc.)
- What was the name of my first pet?
- What’s my favorite candy flavor?
- What’s my go-to Starbucks order?
- What’s my favorite type of cuisine?
- What’s my favorite animal?
- What’s my favorite ice cream flavor?
Those were only some of the questions I asked him and he got NONE of it right. I estimate I asked him around 20 questions in total and he only got less than 10 correct. One of which was: rank my siblings from older to youngest. For some other questions he’d be like, “I know it but it’s on the tip of my tongue!”
We eventually stopped playing because I could tell he wasn’t as playful as he originally was at the start. When I asked him what was wrong, he said “I’m sad because I feel bad.”
Keep in mind, the more he got answers wrong, the sadder and more hurt I got. And after he said those, I had to comfort him and say it was okay. But I feel worse because I just proved that he in fact didn’t know me and I had to comfort him at the end. I’m not upset by the fact that he didn’t know those answers. I think I’m more upset by how he reacted to it. And I feel as if this trickles into deeper parts of our relationship. 3 years down the line and I never really felt heard or seen especially when arguments would arise.