I live on a 4th floor walk up in NYC and I’m so stressed, I’m ready to just get an emergency transfer and leave it all behind.
I used to share this apartment with my mom and 4 cats. We moved here when I was 13.
She passed away in December 2020 and by December 2021 both of the remaining 2 cats were gone too.
With the cats gone, the mice threw a party.
I currently have no access to both of two closets and my bedroom. Top to bottom covered in rodent feces and urine.
I lied to myself mentally about being able to salvage the place. I renovated my living room despite these blockages, including beautiful new furniture. I figured, I’ll just never go in the bedroom. Hell, I don’t need my old high school clothes anyway, forget the closets.
I can’t take it anymore.
I have a pile of clothes in my living room almost as tall as I am. There’s piles of mouse shit falling out of the dust cover of my couch.
I tip toe around my kitchen no matter how many times I Clorox wipe the floors.
I. Want. Out.
I have section 8, I think the bedroom and closets are enough to request an emergency transfer.
But I decorated my living room so nicely that i can’t stand the thought of moving. I’m very good at being “fine” though everything is very clearly not fine.
I know everyone in my neighborhood. Within a 1 block radius I have multiple delis, delicious pizza, diners, clinics, train stations, 99c stores, ect. These employees all watched me grow up. They saw me every day before school and every morning before work. When my mom died, they all worked together to keep me clothed and fed. They make the thought of leaving impossible. But if they knew what I live in they’d tell me to run for the hills.
I have a 30 inch old fashioned box tv. How it got up 4 flights of stairs I do not know but it needs to go back down.
An 82 inch couch that no mover is willing to take because it’s a literal biohazard (will trail rodent feces behind it and all over the workers)
God I need help. So much help.
I have nycha, I have food stamps, I have resources but I don’t know how to use them and to what extent they’re willing to help me.
I feel like leaving everything except the new furniture I bought in the last year and a few sentimental keepsakes and that’s it. I’ll buy new clothes. I keep a few pairs of PJs and my work uniform and everything else must go.
To make matters worse, my renovations are all made of peel and stick. It’s going to be a nightmare to remove. I’m afraid my landlord will sue me for damages if it pulls off paint. I have no idea what to do