u/LawfulnessPerfect752

I am a smoker and I have a surgery on the 15th and I'm really freaking out, because my mom doesn't know I smoke none of my providers know I smoke and I'm really freaking out that I'll die on the table or they'll cancel my surgery if I go back to pre-op by myself and come clean. Anyone have any advice or words of wisdom? It's dental surgery so I'm really freaking out

EDIT: I've been trying to quit 3-5 days before like the paper said but I'm struggling

I feel like no one talks about the mental aftermath of having multiple surgeries, I feel at home in a hospital but if I smell the OR smell or even think about needing surgery I lose my ever loving mind and have a mental spiral, for context I've had multiple surgeries before age 17.

I met with my new therapist and she said I might have an anxious attachment style, anyone else struggle with this?