Screwed it up or happened for the best? (30M, 35F)
I (30M) have been single for a while, and recently, I've met this woman (35F) through my brother, who's actually the friend of his girlfriend. She's divorced, and has a daughter of her own but to be honest, she seemed nice and friendly enough, so I've decided to give it a go and see if there can be something special.
It seemed like we've clicked with each other pretty quickly. We've talked about a lot of stuff, texted a lot, and she seemed pretty likable. Anyways, we were talking about what I do for a living at some point, and I kinda made a joke, which she's found offensive and disrespectful. However, at that time I didn't realize that she was upset since she'd acted as if nothing was wrong. But she'd told my brother's girlfriend that she didn't like that, and my brother ended up asking me about what I'd done to made her upset, which even I've had no clue at that time since she didn't really seem offended over anything... She was texting me even the very next day so.
I can be a little goofy and unserious at times, I'd like to laugh, have fun, and be unapologetically me. Although I might say stuff without thinking things through, and I don't really have a filter when I speak up, so I guess some might find things a little too much, which I might find harmless or fun.
To be frank, I was a little disappointed with her since I kinda expected her to be upfront with me if something wrong happened from my part. I understand that my brother's girlfriend is her friend, but I didn't appreciate that I got to know about this from a third party instead from her, since the conversation happened between us. So I ended up asking her and it ended up becoming a heated argument cuz she was kinda trying to make me feel guilty about it, and I was trying to explain myself and mad at the same time about her not being honest with me. I ended up apologizing, but she'd said that I don't need to apologize cuz I think I did nothing wrong. Even so, I did apologize for making her upset, and let her know that I was disappointed with her. I guess she's made up her mind that this wasn't gonna work, and I was also concerned that if I'd be able to be with somebody who might get upset with me for being myself, I've had no intention to hurt her or anything, but I guess I've messed up. The argument got kinda worse and I didn't back down either, she ended up blocking me.
I am writing this cuz I'm still a little upset, hurt and angry. Maybe I was wrong, but honestly, I barely knew her so how would I know what might make her upset? In my opinion, this could've been avoided if she had been direct with me, and let me know that what I'd said made her upset. I wouldn't really get mad if I heard it from her, instead of from someone else, which still makes me feel a little shitty and humiliated.
What do you think about this? I'd like to know your pov.