קצת בדיכאון מיוקרת החיים פה. רוב המשכורת שלי הולכת על פשוט להתקיים. אני דואגת אם יהיה לי דירה משלי בחיים בכלל במצב הזה נראה שלא אבל אני רואה את כולם עם רכב פרטי ודירה בבעלותם ואני מרגישה מאוד מאחורה.
More of a thought sharing thing.
I’ll start off by saying I’m middle eastern, so I’m between the unmarried minority as the marriage age is early 20s here.
The idea of marriage is terrifying to me. Being with one person for one lifetime sounds scary. My mom didn’t live a good life. Long story short my dad used to be abusive (not anymore) and she used to be the financial pillar of the house. Which is unusual for a middle eastern house hold. She’s still with my dad but clearly could’ve been way happier elsewhere.
I have someone. He’s amazing, kind and everything. But I always fear that one day he’ll change. He’ll stop loving me, he’ll be a different person.
How do I get rid of those feelings? How do I stop worrying about “leaving my comfort zone”. Will they go away? I have briefly shared them with him. But not in such detail