I met this girl on the app. both of us are med students, but she studies in Luzon while I’m in the Visayas area.
Plot twist: we’re both originally from Mindanao, so that’s where we actually met during vacation.
We only went on 2 dates over ~2 weeks of talking, but… it was easy. Like suspiciously easy. No awkward silences, no trying too hard. just natural. She’s honestly exactly my type, and I felt really comfortable around her in a way that doesn’t happen often.
Here’s the problem.
at the time, I wasn’t ready for anything serious. I had just been left by someone who told me they “weren’t ready,” then I found out they got into a relationship right after (with a man haha). That messed me up more than I expected.
So when things started feeling real with this girl, I got scared of becoming the person who hurts someone just because I’m still hurt.
So I told her the truth. that I wasn’t ready. She understood, and she also admitted she wasn’t in the best place either (she had just come out of a 9-month situationship). So we kind of left things there. No drama, just… timing wasn’t right.
But here’s where I’m confused now.
That experience actually made me want to heal properly. Not in a “I’ll distract myself” way, but in a “I don’t want to sabotage something good again” way.
And recently, we’ve been lowkey interacting again (liking each other’s stories, subtle things.) Nothing direct, but enough to make me think we didn’t just completely disappear from each other’s radar.
And I can’t shake this thought:
What if it wasn’t wrong, just early?
We already know we get along. There was mutual respect. No toxicity, no games, no weird ending. Just two people who met at the wrong time but handled it maturely. That feels… rare.
I’m going back home to Mindanao this summer, and part of me is thinking, why not just reach out? Not even to jump into something serious, but just to see where we’re both at now. Worst case, nothing changes. Best case, maybe we meet again with clearer heads and better timing.
I guess I’m scared of two things:
Reaching out and realizing she’s moved on or not interested anymore
Not reaching out and always wondering “what if we tried again when we were actually ready?”
If this was messy or toxic, I’d let it go. But it wasn’t. It was good. And I don’t know if letting something good pass twice is growth… or just fear in disguise.
So yeah.
should I reach out when I’m back home? Or leave it as a nice memory?
Would appreciate honest takes (especially from fellow wlw or anyone who’s been in a “right person, wrong timing” situation).