u/Key_Phase_2318

just bawled my eyes out, i feel so helpless. all my old friends are in top universities and the deans list, the guy i used to be with has a much better girlfriend now, my dad who abandoned me just a year ago who caused all this is living life like he's in his 20s buying whatever luxury he wants. and i just happened to know all that because i accidentally opened my old social media account trying to sell old stuff online as i genuinely dont have a penny to my name. the few people providing me a roof over my head right now are sick and aging. everything i have feared has happened and more. this is a bad dream and i dont feel real anymore

being a lower class girl in a third world country means having only as much rights as an american woman in the 1920s. i dont feel i have any semblance of freewill. it's weird to interact with people who actually have choices in life.

the universe has recently blessed me with eight(or more, i cant even keep count anymore) new neighbours all around my age, in the house right next to ours. they are rowdy and party nearly every night. during the day they're always lounging about the alleyway separating our houses which i till have to pass through everyday to get food from my uncle's house a few meters away. it's literal hell to just pass through this alleyway, both sides are filled with my new neighbours so i have to walk right in the middle. i magine a 10 second walk just absolutely surrounded by people. straight up torture. even when im inside our house i hear their voices all the time, they're so loud that i can even clearly understand their conversations. one of them has a kid and sometimes the kid wanders to our house with one of them chasing after the kid so when im unlucky enough i get jumpscared by these randos even when i dont even take a step outside. just fml