Okay here’s the deal, I’ve known I was gay for a long time, but never had the courage to come out. Growing up, I always hid that part of myself. I played sports, dated girls, and unfortunately even put on a homophobic act. All so people wouldn’t ask questions.
I’m 24 now and I just feel like I’ve had enough. It feels like every day I’m living for someone else, and not for me. I work a job I don’t like, my love life is stalled because I fear coming out, and all of my friends only know high school me. They don’t know the side of me I’ve been hiding. And I don’t think there’s any way they’d accept it.
The second my friends find out that I’m gay and want to be a drag queen, the ridicule and mockery I’ll face will be so intense that I don’t know if I can handle it. I practice my drag when I’m alone and my roomate found one of my dresses. I just shrugged it off and said a girl left it here, and his response was “good, because for I second I thought you were a f*g.”Unfortunately, I just don’t think there’s any way they’d understand.
I don’t know how my family would react. They’re not the type to abandon, but they’re also not the type to be thrilled by the news. I just feel stuck. And it’s the worst possible feeling to have.