u/JustabitLii

Background: I’ve been taught that if someone wants to have you as a guest in their house, wait for an invitation. Hence, my logic is that if I want someone in my house, I should invite them. Also, I am an only child and I am used to quiet surroundings, I tire from people quickly and enjoy my cats, nature and peace.

Me and my husband moved to a countryside house and we’ve done a lot of work (invested time, money, energy and nerves) for the place to be liveable. I work two jobs and also graduate soon and I finally just want to relax and enjoy what we’ve created, in peace. I’ve worked my ass of, tbh, for years, and I feel I deserve my time the way I want it.
My husbands family is quite large and lately I’ve been pissed of by how some of his relatives from cities invite themselves to stay at our place. Like “oh, we will have a vacation in July and thought it’s gonna be fun to visit you!”. Excuse me? Where is the fun in that? Fun for them, sure, but not for me. I have to clean the house, prepare food, clean after they leave, and what do I get out of this? In exchange, I would expect at least some fun conversations but all they do is speak about their toddler (seriously, this is all they speak about). It would be a good day if they ask how am I doing or whether I need help with cooking or whatever, but this happens very rarely and then they get distracted by their child. Funny thing ofc is that when we were restaurating the place and cleaning up after construction works, no one was interested in visiting and helping but once all is done and shiny, everyone wants to enjoy a free acommodation with a nice sauna, berry garden and fresh linen.
Because he has at least three brothers/sisters who do stuff like that occasionally (everyone separately with their families), I feel I never fully recover and already another ones want to show up at our place. Funny that they never invite us to their place :)
Starting with the fact that we have not invited them and ending it with my feelings of being used and drained after they leave, I just don’t want them around. I am waiting for the summer every year so much and literally take everything out of every summer’s day (life in Northern parts) and I don’t want to spend my precious time on people that only care about their own selves and try to sell me the idea that their visit would be wonderful. My husband also gets tired of them quickly because they are all such energy vampires but he wants to save good relations with them. I have not found a permanent solution yet because we can’t be “away” or “sick” every week.

So AITAH for not wanting my husbands family around at our place?