The world is an awful, horrifying place and I can't stand being here...
I am a gentle, sensitive person, who always tries to put positive energy out into the world hoping that I'll be met with similar positive energy, but time after time this world reminds me that I dont belong here amongst these monsters.... my kindness is always taken for granted and met with selfishness and hostility. I can't take it anymore. Why is everyone so fucking shitty? does no one have empathy anymore?
I can hear the comments now, saying I do it to myself, or I should toughen up... fuck that. I am proud of the person I am. I'm very successful, healthy (except my brain), and honestly do more good than bad. Now I've hidden myself from people, moving out to the country and living away from towns, and still people find me and fuck with me. I just want to be left alone and that seems to be the one thing I can't get.
I recently had fake police show up to my house and claim they had a warrant to arrest me. they had my SSN and other personal details, showing that this was premeditated... what does it take for the evil people in this world to leave me alone?!
I hate it here. I hate it everywhere. I can't take it anymore. I am sitting in the tub weeping and just dont know what I did wrong... why is my life like this? if I have to become an asshole to survive this world, I'd rather not.