After my grandma passed my grandpa and I have barely spoke, what should I do?
I (26M) have had very little contact with my grandpa since my grandma unexpectedly passed away this past September, and I think about it every day.
For some background, my mom wasn’t really in my life growing up, and my dad worked away from home during the week until I was around 12. Because of that, I lived with my grandparents (moms side) for a large part of my childhood. My grandma especially was almost like a mother figure to me, and I was very close with her. My younger sister still lives with my grandpa as well.
Even after moving out and starting my own family, I still kept in contact with them, saw them on holidays, and visited when I could. After my daughter was born, I actually started seeing them more often.
Then my grandma was suddenly hospitalized and passed away a few days later. It devastated all of us.
Afterward, I stayed in contact with my grandpa and visited him. About a month later was my wedding. My grandpa and sister both came, but during pictures my wife surprised me with a pin that had my grandma’s picture on it. When it was my grandpa’s turn for pictures, I showed him the pin and he got very upset and left the wedding without saying anything.
I completely understand why he got emotional, but it still hurt me deeply that he left. The photographer even captured the moment, and seeing those pictures still bothers me.
A few days later I called him because my sister told me he was upset with me because I didn’t have a whole lot of time to speak to him between the ceremony and reception, but I had planned to afterwards. We had a pretty awkward conversation, and since then we’ve barely spoken. I talked to him briefly around Christmas, but my family ended up being sick and we couldn’t visit. Since then, neither of us has really reached out. My sister and I have also had very limited contact since all of this happened.
Recently they didn’t come to my daughter’s birthday party either, even though they were invited.
I honestly don’t know what to do. Part of me wants to reach out because I miss him and don’t want things to stay like this forever, but another part of me is afraid of another awkward or painful conversation or even being ignored.
Should I try reaching out again, or give him more time and wait to see if he reaches out first?