u/Jazzlike_Camp_6972

So here’s the situation. Aunt had hip replacement at 89 about 2 months ago. She couldn’t stay in the SKN facility any longer because she plateaued on her rehab (still can’t walk more than 50 feet) so insurance more or less told her it’s time to go.

She has a knee in the same leg that has been bothering her for years and this could have been dealt with back then but due to circumstances which are more disgusting than I care to write it never got addressed.

Fast forward to now. The knee she says hurts so bad she can do the rehab because during her SNF stay she told them it was too painful to walk.

Now, not sure if she wants the knee done but the children are pressing her really hard to get it replaced.

Question is, two months out from a major surgery which she clearly hasn’t recovered from they want her to go through that pain for a TKR.

There are a lot of things going against her. The fact that she hasn’t gotten over the last surgery and the risk of complications for a second surgery so close is frightening. I’m not sure a surgeon would go for that given her frailty and age.

Has anyone had this scenario and what happened?

I’ve been assigned the task of trying to find my mother in law a medi gap plan. I’m not a family member but a son in law. None of the siblings want to do it and after me telling them what I know about it, it’s been dumped on me which is fine.

The problem is my mother in law doesn’t want to give anyone any POA power not even just talking to someone to sign them up or get information. I don’t know her birth date, SSN or annual income which would be needed. I don’t really want to know the last two but need it to make any headway. She won’t share it with the daughters.

I feel weird even bringing it up with my mother in law who is 90 and right now is accumulating a huge bill in skilled nursing because she has no gap covering. I knew she was accumulating a big bill and spoke my mind to the daughters saying this was going to happen but was ignored.

I honestly don’t know what to do next but know something has to be done.

Anyone ever face this before?