returning my "Push Present" after my BF gave the better version to his sister and handed me his "spare" instead?
I (29F) am 29 weeks pregnant and at my limit. For weeks, my partner "Jay" hinted he was getting us both new phones. He kept the models a secret, but he talked it up. I’ve actually been using a broken phone since last year when he broke it during an argument, so he’s known for a long time that I needed a replacement.
Yesterday, he came over and said he was giving me my "push present" early. He handed me an iPhone 17 Pro. But then he started rambling. He said his sister has been "upset lately due to personal reasons," so he gave HER the Pro Max. Then he said he didn't even want a new phone for himself anymore because he'd just "break it at work"—so he basically just handed me the one he’d originally bought for himself.
It feels like the Pro Max was meant for me, but he downgraded me to give his sister the best one, then handed me his "spare" and expected me to be grateful for a gift I only needed because he broke my property months ago.
To make it even worse, I’m currently already using a Pro Max (even though the screen is cracked from when he broke it). So he knew I prefer the larger, better model, yet he still chose to give that one to his sister and hand me the pro for my push present. It felt like he was literally trying to downgrade my life while upgrading hers.
This isn't just about a phone. He let me go to my first pregnancy scan alone on Christmas Eve because he was in a mood. He tells me I’ve "fell off" because I don't get my hair/lashes done while I’m in constant pregnancy pain, and he’s even snatched back baby supplies like the changing mat during arguments. We don’t live together because even though he talks big about being a "provider," he hasn't actually provided a home.
I didn't even peel the stickers off. He asked for it back because i didn’t set it up quick enough for his liking. If his sister’s feelings are more important than his partner’s push present, he can stay with her. I blocked him immediately.
My mum says I’m ungrateful, and I feel like a mug because I’ve dealt with this before. My eldest’s dad once told me I could only go to Mother’s Day dinner if his brother decided not to come. I feel like every man in my life treats me as an afterthought.
Am I wrong for refusing to "submit" and take the leftover phone, or is my dignity worth more than a "second-best" gift?