My mom is constantly criticizing me. About school, my looks, everything. I do understand the school part. I’m not the best at all, but for my looks? I hate myself because of her. She genuinely doesn’t like me. I don’t think she’s ever told me she loves me. My dad sat me down with my mom and asked me if I liked girls or if I was trans. I’d never admit to them I’ve considered the second one. Currently, I’m not trans though, so I truthfully said no. He asked me why I have no interest in men and whether it’s because I like girls.
This makes no sense, because I’m not even allowed to date. If I brought a guy home, I can’t even imagine what would happen.
My mom is just constantly talking crap about me. Calls me ugly, masculine, too skinny, and says she doesn’t like what her daughter has become. Also, hates that I cut my hair. It used to be to my waist and now it’s above my shoulders. I did it without permission since she was adamant about not doing it.
She always tells me she’s not proud of me. Hearing this every single day is so exhausting. I always think of it. I’ve told her how it’s hurtful. She says she feels like she has a son and not a daughter anymore, whatever. She also calls me crazy since I take various meds for my mental health, and if I ever show any signs of wanting to cry in front of her she mocks me and calls me a baby.
I’m also not allowed to go to the gym because I’m a girl. This is just scratching the surface. Why the hell is she like this? She’s a grown woman. I’m so appalled.