TLDR: Were together for a year - long distance. Broke up for 7 months because I (F26) I moved to a beach town (online work)- for the community and nature and he (M30) was hurt and jealous and I didn’t spend enough time with him. 7 months later have restarted, after 1 month and a half together he wants me to move in with him in two weeks or if not break up again but there are still major issues of distrust from him, anxious attachment and resentment that I’m not sure will if living together will fix or amplify.
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I broke up with him when I moved for a couple months to the beach town. Throughout our first relationship was quite tumultuous for various reasons - including long distance, but also extreme jealousy from his end, and intense avoidance from my end (barely wanting to spend time with him or visit him where he lives). I was in love with him, but felt like he didn't really allow me room to breathe - although admittedly it was my first relationship and I think I was scared of proximity and wanted more room than was normal for a relationship. Several things happened but I ended up breaking things off with him in July of 2025 due to me choosing to move to a beach town for a few months.
However in January of this year, I came back to my city for a few months and within that time frame I've restarted things with him following a visit to see him in his city in March, and have been spending several weeks with him back to back. It has been lovely reconnecting, and I realise I really love him for many reasons and appreciate him as a partner, but I'm having trouble knowing whether to continue with him or not. The reason for this is because my original plan was to move to back to the beach town for a few months in May, as I had only planned on coming to my city for a few months. I have a great deal of community in the town and feel very aligned there, surrounded by nature. However, he wants me to move in with him and look for a place together in his city as he cannot move due to his job, and has told me he does not want to do long distance for any amount of time even if I come visit every two weeks, and even after me suggesting that I could move with him after I spend the summer in beach town. So after many discussions and fear of losing him, I have agreed to only spend two weeks in the beach town now to collect my things, and then go stay with him in his city for us to find a place together.