Second bowl of ramen for the day with a blue bell cheese accoutrement.
Trigger warning for self-harm (not me)
As a man in his late 20s whose life is kicking him in the balls I just want to say this is an awesome subreddit and community.
So what’s going on?
Passed up on a promotion, went to my friend who’s quitting in a few months anyways (he told me). Career is slowly starting to get away from me. I’m losing motivation at work, when I first started I was bright eyed and bushy tailed but over the course of the past year I’ve been picking up the slack of other people quietly and working on the projects no one else wants to and it’s been killing me. When I talk to my boss about it he has nothing but stellar reviews and praise for my work ethic and what I can do. “Internal Equity” might be my least favorite corporate passphrase since that seems to be the culprit here per him.
I lost my uncle, he committed suicide in October with a shotgun. Tearing up just thinking about it. He took me fishing, hell the only reason I have a fishing pole right now is because of him. He’d text me happy birthday every year. I went to his service a few weeks ago, seeing his daughter and my whole family there was devastatingly hard. It has my whole brain so scrambled I’ve had to take edibles almost every night just to sleep.
My folks are in their 70s and their health is deteriorating, I went from being in college to having to worry about what to do for them because every time I see them they want to talk about their ailments and their will and what they want me to do with all of their stuff when they’re dead (im an only child so there’s no one else).
I got addicted to nicotine having not used ANY until last year. That coupled with my girlfriend who smokes a ton of weed has really changed my habits, I’m easily influenced by those around me. And I hate that I’ve had to rely on these substances just to feel okay.
I used to super ripped (8 pack abs etc etc) but I’ve had NO motivation to go to the gym. I have some fat on my stomach for the first time in my life and my body image is at an all time low.
I feel like I’m barely functioning as an adult.
Shit just piles and piles, I can cry all I want on here about my problems but what I want to know from YOU is HOW to get stronger to be handle all this shit. If yall have any advice it would be appreciated.