I (F16) am having 'issues' with my best friend, also F16. How can I begin to fix this or deal with her drifting away in a healthy way?
i'm 16 and in high school rn for context. i met a girl very early on into the school year (octoberish i believe) and we've been best friends pretty much ever since. i've shared a lot with her and have believed that we'll be friends forever for a while now. lately, things are changing.
in spring break (3 ish months ago) i could notice she wasnt in the mood to talk to me when we were on call. i didn't bring it up because she's allowed to have bad days of course, but this is a constant thing and ONLY with me. at some point she sent me a screenshot of someones note thingy on instagram and i could see she'd unpinned me and one of her other best friends and she had my notifs silenced but she didn't have anyone else silenced.
a month or so ago i did talk to her about how she'd been ignoring me a lot, breaking off our conversations, ignoring me over text, on calls or even in-person, etc. and she said she'd been in a bad place lately. she told me she was going to try to talk to me more or be more open about how she's feeling since it was affecting me negatively and reiterated that she viewed me as one of her best friends. i have depression, and i've been going through an episode for a while now so that might play a lot into my feelings as of now, but pretty much everyone of my friends except for two has been treating me really weird. my other best friend who i've known since middle school doesn't like to eat lunch with me anymore and she's weird about it too. the best friend this post is about has another best friend who she had pinned in that screenshot i was talking about, and we have a group chat together.
in this groupchat they'll often talk to each other and openly exclude me or just play fight with me when i say anything. even in my personal conversations with her she brings her up CONSTANTLY and i think she's realized i'm getting annoyed by now but i've been ignoring texts from both of them all day pretty much so that's whatever.
the main issue i'm having is how to approach this. i've been coming home from school crying and my mom knows something is wrong but i don't even know how to explain it to her. i'm considering just switching high schools next year but i have anxiety and meeting new people is also insanely scary. i feel like shit where i am with my friends rn and i feel as though i can't talk to anybody about this because my best friend is insanely popular and i know most if not all of our mutual friends prefer her over me. if i lose her i lose everything in this school. i hate how much this is affecting me but one of my classes has her and a lot of our mutual friends in it and i've starting working outside of class with my teacher's permission because i'm so overwhelmed and upset in there.
i've also slowly began to realize what made me feel so connected to her at the same time. we have really good days and today was a day where i felt really good about my friendship with her but then it felt like her best friend was upset w me and i don't really know. things are always changing and sometimes i feel really upset and other times its better. at the same time i've taken advice from some other close friends and begun to distance myself from her and her best friend.
i appreciate any advice, thank you for taking the time to read this.