u/Impossible-Bison-716

My first real relationship in my mid to late 20s, I always was the one to guard my heart and not let people in. With my ex he was so consistent in the beginning and the love was so intense. Towards the end we argued a lot but in my mind that’s normal plus I keep fighting to fix it cause idk that’s how I was raised if you love someone don’t let them go…we were together for 1.5 years & he ended it twice in the relationship the last time he ended it he blamed me and said I was too much to deal with. The first time we broke up of course me being dumb I begged him to stay and fix it he was cold and nonchalant. Weeks later he called begging for me back etc. we broke up in November he said it was too much pressure and he didn’t have the patience to deal with my sh*t so this time I just let him go. He told my brother he texted me for the holidays & new years but he’s been blocked since the first day we broke up. I feel so stupid 6 months later ( this month ) still missing someone that literally would go days or weeks without even communicating with their own mother( that’s relationship was so rocky) but regardless I know it’s easier for him to not speak to me it just sucks feeling easy to forget and leave behind. Idk I just wish I can get over it already I’m usually over any situation by now. I lost so much weight over 15lbs ,I lost motivation to start my nursing program again( I have one year left) idk I just idk lol