AITAH for being upset with my boyfriend and best friend over a concert situation?
AITAH
So for context, me, my boyfriend Ryan, and my best friend Chloe (fake names) are all really close and we usually go to concerts together.
A few months ago I sent my boyfriend an Instagram that showed Jason Derulo coming to Australia saying we should go. I’ve brought it up multiple times since then too because I was genuinely excited about it.
I looked at the tickets yesterday to see if he still had tickets for sale and he did. I texted the group chat with Chloe and Ryan in it seeing if they wanted to go they were both down Chloe was going to text me when she finished work and had a look at them. I didn’t receive a message yesterday so I texted again this morning asking if I should buy the tickets she asked when it was again and I told her. When I didn’t hear anything I asked again and she asked what the price is. I checked the prices and yes, some of the really good seats were around $400. But there were also cheaper tickets for around $160. I sent it into the group chat and said something like “the good seats are $400 but I’m happy to get the cheaper ones so we can still go.”
Chloe replied saying she didn’t want to spend $400 to see Jason Derulo because she isn’t really a huge fan anyway. That honestly didn’t upset me too much because we do have different tastes in music and I understood not wanting to spend that much money on an artist you don’t care about.
But then I messaged Ryan asking if he still wanted to go and he replied saying “not for $400, that’s crazy.”
That’s what upset me because it felt like neither of them even listened to the fact I already said there were cheaper tickets.
I think the reason it hurt me so much though is because it made me start thinking about all the other times I’ve shown up for the things they wanted to do, even if I wasn’t personally interested.
For example, Chloe once asked the group chat if we wanted to go see an artist she liked. I said yes and got off work early as I new she really liked this artist. Even though I didn’t know many of there songs maybe a max of 3 songs. Ryan also said he would come aswell he new a few more songs then me but not it’s not someone he cares about.
Another example is when Ryan wanted to go see Drake. I’m honestly not a Drake fan at all, but I still agreed because I knew he really wanted to go. I even waiting Ticketek website to buy the tickets for him as he couldn’t do it while he was working so I sat at work and waiting till I got through and brought the tickets for us. Those tickets were also around $400, which is why this whole thing stung even more.
It started making me feel like when it’s something they want to do, everyone gets excited and makes the effort. But when it’s something I want, it gets brushed off straight away.
I got upset and ended up asking my dad if he was free the night of the concert as no one else wanted to come with me to see Jason and he knew I still really wanted to go as we were speaking about it the night before. He immediately said yes. But when I told Ryan, he got upset and said “well if I knew you really wanted to go then I would’ve gone with you.”
That frustrated me because I felt like I had made it obvious. I sent him the post months ago, brought it up multiple times, and was literally trying to compromise on cheaper tickets so we could all still go.
I ended up crying over it because I think it became about more than just the concert. It made me feel like I’m always willing to support everyone else’s interests but people don’t really do the same for me.
There’s also smaller things that have been bothering me too. Ryan plays soccer and Chloe will come watch his home games when we invite her. But I play indoor netball and Chloe has never come to one of my games. When I asked if she wanted to come to one close to our house she said no because she doesn’t like netball.
I know nobody is forced to spend money or come to things they don’t enjoy, so now I’m wondering if I’m being too sensitive or if my feelings are actually valid here.
Thanks guy also sorry for spelling I do have dyslexia