After my recent diagnosis and learning about Autistic traits of mine vs. neurotypical/allistic people. There is a perceived characteristic of mine that I wonder if my Autism/auDHD gives off, even though it isn't there?
Throughout my whole life, I have in the past been treated like I am a sneak, scheming, a slacker, someone trying to cut corners, make excuses, etc.
Like, I'd see my bosses fully trusting my coworkers, but for instance, I once called out of work on a Friday because I was feeling ill. The following Monday, my supervisor was asking me weird questions like "Did you have fun?" My coworker who was listening later told me he didn't believe that I was sick and he was just testing me to see if I'd reveal what I was actually doing.
One time, there was a snowstorm coming through, and I was relying on public transportation at the time, they were going to be cutting off public transit early for the storm (so there would be no bus when I got out of work), and Ubers and taxis are near impossible to get during storms, plus Uber is like $40+ which I couldn't afford. So I asked my boss if I could go home early before public transit was cut off for the day (it would have been about an hour early). I was accused of grasping for an excuse to leave work early??
Back in college, I was being evicted from my housing and I had 30 days to find somewhere to go, so I asked my professor if I could get an excused absence and if I could get a copy of her power point presentation should I have to go view an apartment, because I can't afford to hold off on viewings as housing was in short supply in that college town. She told me no because she could tell I was the type who when you give them an inch, they take it a mile, and suddenly I'm wanting to be excused for every little thing.
Even my own parents treated me like I was a liar and a schemer when I wasn't. I've never been like this and yet people all around me treated me this way. When asking for understanding and accommodations, I was genuinely asking for it. I wasn't trying to get out of something, or slack, or whatever.
In grade school, I was always the "She's very quiet and sweet... a little too quiet and sweet, don't you think?" girl. And I was thrown into drama, and accused of feeling and thinking ways I didn't, and doing things I hadn't.
I've began to wonder if it's the phenomena where allistic/neurotypical people statistically can sense that something is different about a person who is Autistic, even when neither parties are aware. And so when someone is different or off to these people, they err on a more cynical side and this creates a lack of trust, and they're just waiting for the autistic person to reveal their true self to them. Prior to my diagnosis, my fiance said I am a 'blacnk canvas' personality. I am quiet and softspoken, so people project onto me.