I didn’t expect it to hit this fast. It’s only Day 1 and my mind keeps drifting back like some annoying loop I can’t shut off. I’ll be doing normal shit and then boom, random images, urges, like wtf. Part of me is already trying to justify it, like just one last time wouldn’t matter. That voice is way louder than I thought.
I’m trying to stay grounded but honestly I feel restless as hell. Not even horny all the time, just… uncomfortable in my own head. I keep reaching for my phone without thinking, like muscle memory or something. I caught myself twice and it kinda pissed me off. Feels like I don’t even fully control my own habits yet.
I know it’s just Day 1 but this already feels harder than I told myself it would be. Anyone else get this weird mental pull right away or am I just weak here?