u/Icy-Zebra8501

Does anyone else feel lonely being in a relationship with someone with NVLD? My wife’s IQ is 84. She is unable to keep conversations, we cannot talk about anything. Parenting is a disaster with the 4-year olds constantly screaming in anxiety.

Had a restraining order for 2 years because I intervened in abuse of the children in Spain.

Had another relationship with a Colombian woman that was absolutely amazing. I felt alive. But she used me for money so I kicked her out as I didnt think of her as responsible. She assumed money was infinite.

Now I don’t know how to continue life. Restraining order over. But feel like I am stuck just to make sure the kids have a good life the other 50% of the time. I just know she won’t survive.

I am 36 - IQ 133 with autism level 1.

On January 5 I met a Colombian woman on Hinge in Spain, on January 11 we met, on January 12 she kissed me. On January 16 I was moving, she helped me move and started sleeping over every day (basically moving in). I paid for her rent on January 17.

April 2025 we break up because she helps other Colombian women move illegally and gifts her illegal employment to them while then living for free on my dime.

May 2025 she calls me sporadically to see how I am doing.

July 2025 I pay her to clean my house I bought because I knew she had difficulties finding work.

August 2025: I buy plane tickets so her kids in Colombia can visit her in Spain in December 2025.

She shits on the relationship for the rest of 2025. Justifies not contributing as helping my attend psychologists, doctors or other appointments. I had 400k COP in my account left for 4 people to buy food. She was illegally working and refused to contribute. I even got her on recording saying she refused to eat the food I prepared out of protest.

In Colombia she is going after her ex-husband for violencia intra-familiar and has 2 kids with him. He pays her 7M COP for principio oportunidad in November 2024, only to get bombarded during audencia in March 2025 he did not change and got denied. She never paid back the 7M COP. In August 2025 she launched more lawsuits against him for not paying alimentos.

Her ex told me he was voluntarily supporting her from 2014 till 2017, similar to my situation. And he felt like she was exchanging sex for money.

I assumed she cared about me, she really had an eye for detail. I cannot tell whether she was just badly educated or whether it was actually 'estafa'.

She falsely accused me of hitting her and abusing her sister. But neither of which ever happened. Which makes me wonder if her ex-husband also was falsely accused.

Now I am about to start a querella criminal (SPOA) in Spain against her for estafa agravada (estafa amorosa), maltrato habitual, violencia economica and lesiones psiquicas.

It is likely I will win. But I still don't know how I can help the ex-husband. As his case moved into trial phase.

I assumed I was voluntarily helping a woman that was abused by a former husband. Not realizing she was the bad one.

I am trying to tip off fiscalia in Colombia while still filing my case in 6 weeks.